a sockful of instant karma

Had a boozy dinner party on Saturday. was awesome. woke up with a serious throbber and just enough time to dress and drive out to the temple to meet up with the folks for "pray for whatever day" (yes yes! I know, my atheist ass will burn in hell) . I lost an hour due to daylight saving, that would have otherwise been used to sober up a little. damnit.
anyway I get there. mumble incoherently through some prayers. then it hits me.
The contents of last nights indulgences.
I rush to the toilet. Now monks must be a masochistic lot because the toilet at the temple you need to take your shoes off and walk down an infinitely long corridor of the coldest concrete floor outside of Siberia; while busting. I get to the toilet, slam the door and realise, some bastard has urinated all over the floor. first things first, i do my business. relieved, my mind wanders...
should I saw off my foot at the ankle before frostbite and gangrene set in?
what did I do recently to warrant this dose of instant karma? was it

• sending my guests home over 0.5?
• lampooning of a friend who unfortunately looks like Kim Jong Il?
• plotting to "out" a relative?
• too many Ben Cousins jokes?
  
• my general bastardry?

My thoughts are interupted by a brusk rap on the door. and again... and yet again. impatient loser. I flush and to my horror the bowl fills but does not recede. I decide its best not to think about whether I'm standing in number 1 or number 2. (Doh too late!).
The elderly lady gives me the hairy eyeball, to which I return a wry smile. Spread the love!